South African Jokes: 2013

2013-12-03

[Fwd: What do we make of this?]

AND WE WONDER WHETHER WE NEED TO WORRY ABOUT OUR FUTURE HERE IN SA??

From their "membership form" at http://effighters.org.za/

I, Fighter.... solemnly declare that I will abide by the aims,
objectives and radical policies of Economic Freedom Fighters as set out
in the Constitution of the EFF. I voluntarily join the EFF without any
motive of personal gain or material benefit. I will participate in the
life of the Economic Freedom Fighters to strive towards total
emancipation of South Africa, Africa and the oppressed of the world and
will do so as a loyal, active and disciplined Economic Freedom Fighter.

I further declare to defend the proud and militant legacy left by the
fallen generations of South African heroines and heroes. To work towards
a South Africa that truly belongs to all who live in it. Defend the
African revolutionary tradition against all forms of tendencies that
promote hatred, divisions, underdevelopment, corruption and social discords.

2013-11-30

[Fwd: Extreme safety measures!]

Zuma was *SERIOUSLY* concerned with his safety and that of his family!

2013-10-04

[Fwd: The new colonials have arrived]

2013-07-25

[Fwd: BUMPER STICKER]

2013-07-24

[Fwd: Beer versus Books]

Consider this:

South African Breweries [SAB] delivers liquor successfully to over
800,000 bottle stores and shebeens across SA weekly.

The SA Government cannot deliver textbooks to 26,000 schools once
a year.

If SAB and Government swap delivery methods, we could have a
civilised, sober and educated country!!!

2013-07-16

[Fwd: Public sleeping competition - Hosted at the 2012 Budget Speech]

CAN SOUTH AFRICA SURVIVE, GIVEN THE FOLLOWING?

The folks who are getting free stuff don't like the folks who are paying
for the free stuff, because the folks who are paying for the free stuff
can no longer afford to pay for both the free stuff and their own stuff.

The folks who are paying for the free stuff want the free stuff to stop,
and the folks who are getting the free stuff want even more free stuff
on top of the free stuff they are already getting!

The people who are forcing the people to pay for the free stuff have
told the people who are RECEIVING the free stuff, that the people who
are PAYING for the free stuff, are being mean, prejudiced, and racist.

So the people who are GETTING the free stuff have been convinced they
need to hate the people who are paying for the free stuff by the people
who are forcing some people to pay for their free stuff, and giving them
the free stuff in the first place.

"The problem with socialism is that eventually you run out of other
people's money." -- Margaret Thatcher

[Fwd: Back problems]

Doctors were receiving an increasing number of complaints about back
problems from SA politicians, members of parliament, mayors etc.

After a short and intense investigation it was found that these problems
originated from the matresses they were sleeping on.

2013-06-25

Fwd: Ever wonder why Zuma doesn't like Zapiro?!

2013-05-26

Bread Winner

2013-05-25

South Africa's new National Bird

Common name: Indian Mynah.
Scientific name: Guptensia Waterkloofus

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2013-05-23

[Fwd: MISSING HUSBAND]

A woman phones the Polokwane police station and says, "My husband is
missing. He went to buy potatoes two days ago and hasn't come back yet."

There is a long pause before the police woman says, "Eish mem! Can't you
cook something else?"