HOLLAND : Goeden nagt!
GERMANY : Gute Nacht!
AUSTRALIA : Night, Mate!
USA : Goodnite!
SOUTH AFRICA:
Are the doors locked, are the windows closed??
Did you pull in the cars and activate the alarms??
Are the rottweilers on their post??
Sleep tight, don't worry, Eskom will switch off the lights.
Last year's (reported) cime statistics have been released.
Good news: Instead of 54.3 murders PER DAY in the 2003/2004 period,
murders have declined to 49.7 murders PER DAY for the 2008/2009 period.
Oh, joy!
http://promoimages.iol.co.za/templates/pdf/totals.pdf
A South African court on Tuesday sentenced a man to life imprisonment
for the murder of lesbian footballer Eudy Simelane who was gang raped
and robbed in an attack last year.
The Delmas court, east of Johannesburg, sentenced the man to life for
the 31-year-old's murder, 20 years for being an accomplice to rape and
15 years for robbery, said Phumi Mtetwa of the Equality Project.
Two other men were acquitted of the attack on the well known lesbian
activist and former national women's football team player, whose body
was found in an open field in KwaThema township last April.
Themba Mvubu's conviction follows a 32 year sentence handed down in
February to a fourth accused who pled guilty to murder, robbery and
being an accomplice to rape but later retracted statements implicating
the other three.
Simelane's sexuality was ruled out in the first sentencing as a motive
in her killing but activists have linked the case to "corrective rape"
in which lesbians are targets of sexual violence.
---
In March, a new study by anti-poverty group Action Aid warned that South
African lesbians were suffering rapes by men trying to "cure" their
homosexuality.
South Africa is one of the world's most violent societies with fresh
crime statistics released Tuesday showing a rise of sexual offences by
10,4 percent with 27 750 rapes committed in six months. - Sapa-AFP
In Mayfair, Johannesburg a fire destroyed a block of flats.
A Nigerian family of six con-artists lived on the first floor, and all
six died in the fire.
An Islamic group of seven Somalian welfare cheats, all illegally in
the country, lived on the second floor, and they, too, all perished in
the fire.
Six local ex-cons lived on the 3rd floor and they too, died.
One white couple lived on the top floor. The couple survived the fire.
Hearing this on national news, Julius Malema and Zwelinzima Vavi were furious.
They flew into Jo'burg, teamed-up with Jacob Zuma and quickly demanded
a meeting with the Fire Chief.
On camera, they loudly demanded to know why the Blacks all died in the
fire and only the white couple lived.
The Fire Chief replied, "The whites were at work."
Sipho gets in line, and when it's his turn, the preacher asks: "
Sipho, what do you want me to pray about for you."
Sipho replies: "Preacher, I need you to pray for my hearing."
The preacher puts one finger in Sipho's ear, and he places the other
hand on top of Sipho's head and prays and prays and prays, he prays a
blue streak for Sipho.
After a few minutes, the Preacher removes his hands, stands back and
asks, " Sipho, how is your hearing now?"
Sipho says, "I don't know, Reverend, it is only next Wednesday!"
A lady lost three panties in her house and blamed her maid in front of
her husband.
The maid replied, "Aikona, Madam! Baas, you know very well that I never
wear panties, just tell da madam."
I hear that Caster Semenya is giving up athletics and will now be
playing tennis in the mixed doubles section...
1. Insert banana into vagina.
2. Leave for 30 seconds, then remove.
3. If it's half-eaten, there's another fucking monkey on its way!
(received via SMS)
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