2011-12-01

Last Dictator Standing


2011-11-23

[Fwd: Black Tuesday 2]

The controversial Protection of Information Bill has been attracting
international attention, most of it unfavourable, as it heads towards
adoption in Parliament.

Newspapers in the US and Britain especially have written about the
so-called "secrecy bill", focusing on sharp criticism of it by people
such as Nobel Prize for Literature winner and ANC member Nadine
Gordimer.

Britain's Daily Telegraph said Gordimer had warned that, through the
bill, the ANC was taking South Africa "back to the suppression of free
expression" of the apartheid era.

"Her intervention is hugely significant," the paper said. "Gordimer was
a close friend of Nelson Mandela (he read her novel Burger's Daughter in
jail in Robben Island and asked her to visit as soon as he came out) and
she helped lead the fight against apartheid in her native South Africa."


The Telegraph also quoted Gordimer as saying: "People have fought and
died to gain the opportunity for a better life, which is ruined and
dirtied by corruption. The corrupt practices and nepotism that they
allow themselves is exposed if we have freedom of expression."

The Voice of America said: "The measure would update apartheid-era
provisions, and punish those who publish classified information with up
to 25 years in jail.

"Critics say the proposed law is extreme, and have argued for a clause
that allows revealing state secrets in the public interest."

The Washington Post noted that Gordimer was one of many critics of the
bill, who also included "prominent ANC members... among them a former
state security minister (Ronnie Kasrils)".

Critics "within and outside the governing party" had warned the
legislation "would smother freedom of expression and make it harder to
fight corruption".

The Washington Post also noted the fears of activists that for South
Africa - "known for one of the continent's freest and most open
constitutions" - to pass such legislation - "could influence other
countries in the region".

When the bill was introduced last year, along with a proposal for a
media tribunal, the Wall Street Journal said the measures "could reshape
South Africa's media industry".

As the bill got closer to being put to the vote, the newspaper said the
"tensions over the media are part of a searching national debate over
the political course of a key African democracy".

It quoted Anton Harber, head of the Wits Journalism School, as warning
that other African countries looked up to South Africa and the bill was
a "bad example for the rest of the continent".

The Christian Science Monitor said the ANC was "close to dramatically
restricting the rights of citizens to monitor the actions of their
government officials".

It had earlier quoted Karin Karlekar, managing editor of the Freedom of
the Press report for Freedom House in New York, as saying: "We see this
as part of a broader trend in South Africa, and it's very worrying."

The Monitor said Freedom House had downgraded South Africa from "free"
to "partly free", in its Freedom of the Press rankings.

"Historically, South Africa was one of the top performers in the past 15
years, as a model for other African countries," Karlekar said. "In South
Africa, as in other countries, the media are one of the watchdogs of
society in support of good governance in institutions, and to take (it)
away... weakens democracy as a whole."

The Monitor also noted: "Curiously, some African countries - notably
Kenya and Nigeria - have moved in the opposite direction... enshrining
the freedom of information... Nigeria enacted a Freedom of Information
law."

But it also quoted analyst Steven Friedman, director of the Democracy
and Governance programme at the University of Johannesburg, as saying
although the bill was "horrible", there was "no way this legislation is
going to shut down investigative journalism".

Friedman cited the clauses "that say you can't classify information in
order to cover up government incompetence, or to protect the government
from embarrassment".

US embassy spokeswoman Elizabeth Trudeau said: "The US supports the
freedom of the press, and the public's right to hold governments and
government officials accountable. We hope the government, civil society,
activists, NGOs and media continue a dialogue to seek common ground on
this critical issue."

http://www.iol.co.za/news/world/sa-back-to-the-days-of-apartheid-1.1183460

[Fwd: Black Tuesday 1]

The catch phrases are difficult to ignore: "right to know", "no to
censorship", "freedom of the press", "don't gag the media". Though the
colour black might be quite trendy today and #BlackTuesday will be
trending on Twitter, it's important that we look a little deeper and not
be distracted by the fanfare - even as we all dress like waiters,
bouncers and Goths.

We the media often portray this as our battle and at times purport to be
the sole victim when the truth is that the only victim here is you, dear
citizen, the one who buys our newspapers, who visits our websites and
who tunes into our news bulletins.

You're the victim not because we won't be able to tell you who screwed
whom or who got tender-rich overnight. No, you're the victim because you
will be denied those everyday truths that make up the world we live in.
Simple snippets of information that form the basis of our reality will
be almost impossible to find. Our cash-strapped media houses don't have
the money to go to court to every time they need to gain information
under the current Act. We would have to contend with "information
officers" who are full of everything but information. They are an
oxymoron just waiting to happen.

Yes, information is the lifeblood of journalism. This is what we do, we
disseminate information in what we believe is, the public interest.
Sometimes we get it wrong. By passing the Protection of State
Information Bill today, government is not so much gagging the media as
it is blindfolding you, not from the sensational, but from the mundane
like Records of Decisions, environmental impact studies and task team
reports. A nation of blind followers is easier to control, easier to
influence - more subservient. When the only reality you know is the one
created for you by misinformation, lies and denials, what reason do you
have to challenge the status quo? The lack of a public interest clause
in the Bill means any whistle-blower faces certain jail, so who would
dare cross the line?

The people of Libya, Egypt and Tunisia were fed lies from the mouths of
corrupt politicians and dictators. They lived and breathed the fallacies
presented to them for decades by state-owned media houses. Only truth
broke that spell, and it wasn't the media who spurred it on. It was
ordinary citizens who simply decided to stop believing the lies from a
government that was running out of excuses. They found a common cause
and disseminated their own version of the truth through social media and
the foreign press; the same truth that Anton Hammerl and scores of other
journalists died pursuing.

We understand that there is information in the hands of government that
would genuinely affect national security but a government that denies
basic truths and openness is a government that is saying it is not
accountable to you and me as citizens. So how do we trust them? How do
we believe anything they say from now on? How do we know if they have
our interests at heart?

By now you're probably wondering what the big secret is. Well, there
isn't one. You clicked on this link out of curiosity or a need for
knowledge. It is a basic human function that has propelled our species
to greatness. The pursuit of knowledge has inspired us and helped us
become better at what we do - survive. The hunger for truth has brought
about democracy, toppled dictators, destroyed lives and saved millions
more. How dare you let anyone take that away from you?

http://www.iol.co.za/news/politics/pssst-let-me-tell-you-a-secret-1.1183468

2011-11-16

[Fwd: Julius Malema goes into a gallery]

Julius Malema goes into a gallery.

He looks at the paintings, and then he turns to a lady standing next to
him and asks, "Did a white person actually paint all this shit?"

The lady turns around and responds, "No sir, that's a mirror".

2011-11-14

[Fwd: Winnie in London]

While visiting the United Kingdom, Winnie Mandela was invited to a
cocktail party which was also to be attended by Margaret Thatcher.

When Winnie saw the ex-prime minister on the other side of the room she
barged past everyone, spilling the drinks of several invited guests on
the way.

Winnie elbowed her way to Maggie, stood brazenly in front of her and
declared, "I hear they call you the Iron Lady!"

"I have been referred to by that name, yes," replied Maggie, peering
down her nose at this impudent upstart. "And whom, may I enquire, do I
have the honour of addressing ?" asked Maggie icily.

"I am the iron lady of South Africa !" bragged Winnie, waving her fist
in the air.

"Oh, yes," replied Maggie dryly. "And for whom do you iron?"

2011-10-19

[Fwd: This is why we don't speak Dutch in SA]

2011-10-08

[Fwd: Certified and declared]

2011-10-05

[Fwd: South African Speed limit...]

3 Roadside workers
1 Pole
1 Road sign

Speed limit?

("Slow, workers" -- or "slow workers"?)

[Fwd: We need proof!]

Julius Malema walks into an FNB bank and asks to cash a cheque for R2000.

Teller: "No problem Sir. Could you please show me your ID."?

Malema: "Well, I didn't bring my ID with me as I didn't think there
was any need. After all, I am the President of the ANC Youth League."

Teller: "Yes, I know who you are, but with all the regulations, I must
insist on seeing ID."

Malema: "Just ask anyone here who I am and they will tell you. They all
know who I am."

Teller: "I am sorry, but these are the bank rules and I must follow them."

Malema: "Is there some other way around this?"

Teller: "Look, here's what we can do: a while ago now, Casta Semenia
walked into the bank without ID. To prove she was Casta she ran around
the block in under 8 seconds.

Another time, Francois Pienaar came in without ID. He yanked out his
rugby ball and kicked it just under 300m right into Nedbank's yard.
After that spectacular kick we cashed his cheque.

So, what can you do to prove to me that you are really who you say you are?"

Malema stands, deep in thought for what seems like minutes then finally
says: "My mind's a complete blank. Honestly, I can't think of a single
thing..."

Teller: "Would fifties be OK, sir?"

2011-10-02

[Fwd: David Bullard's article on Malema]

AN EARLY WARNING WAKE UP CALL FOR US ALL!!


The antics of Julius Malema may be good for a laugh now, but they
remind me of the early days of Idi Amin.

Young JuJu is already allowed to travel in a car with no number plates
with no fear of prosecution.

He refuses to give answers to the media as to how he acquired such
wealth in such a short time, and he may even enjoy special status with
the Receiver of Revenue.

In the face of overwhelming evidence that he's a sleazebag, the ruling
party remain silent. Perhaps they have their own plans for JuJu, but
maybe they are quietly chuckling to themselves and saying "that's my
boy". If it's the latter then we really are up shit creek without a
paddle.

We will look back on 2010 not as the year we hosted the FIFA World Cup,
but as the year the cancer that destroyed the country was first detected
and identified.

We've had some low lifes before and many of them from the ANCYL, but
Malema's combination of stupidity, greed and arrogance plus his
willingness and ability to lie with a straight face make him a man to be
feared.

We may be chortling at his antics now but we won't be laughing when his
goons start kicking in the heads of his political enemies.

If JuJu wants something, JuJu gets it, so there'll be no argument about
the nationalisation of the mines - whatever JZ may have said to Gordon
Brown.

It won't be JZ's government any more so it will have been no lie for
him to say that "my government have no plans to nationalise the mines".

Things change quickly in Africa and a verbal contract isn't worth the
paper it's written on as Sam Goldwyn once said.

And the media won't fare too well either. JuJu will by that time have
declared himself emperor for life, and will be throwing huge parties and
feeding the likes of Stephen Grootes and Justice Malala to his pet lions
- and videoing it for YouTube.

If you think Malema is a joke look at his supporters. Are they livid
that he has bilked the poor and lives a life of luxury? Of course not.
To them he is the man who, along with people like Jimmy Manyi, is
finally going to put the whites in their place.

These are the chaps whose destiny it is to foment racial hatred.

It's only a matter of time before white bank accounts will be frozen
and redistributed to the needy. The argument will be typical Malema
logic... you can't need the money if you leave it in the bank earning
interest.

Whites will not be allowed to leave anything to their descendants and
white businesses will need to be black owned. No sorry... my mistake...
we already have that one don't we?

Rather like the Jews before World War 2, whites will look back and
wonder why they never saw it coming. Well, they probably did but they
were too timid to speak out for fear of being labeled racists.

2011-10-01

[Fwd: Simple logic]

Dear Mr Malema and ANCYL members,


I would like the opportunity to ask you some simple questions regarding
your struggle for economic freedom. At the moment, I am failing to see
how your actions are in the long term interests of South Africa.

Please enlighten me by addressing the following points:


Mines

At the moment, mines contribute roughly 8% to total GDP. I do not
understand why you are so fixated on nationalising this rather small
portion of the nation's wealth and causing significant amounts of
political uncertainty in the process.

The services sector constitutes 66% of GDP. Therefore it seems logical
that short term economic freedom lies in a friendly service mentality
and functional literacy. When compared to the mines, 8 times more
wealth lies in this direction. Unfortunately, however, I do not really
get an impression of a friendly service mentality and functional
literacy from your present membership.


Farms

Your calls for expropriation of land without compensation have badly
polarized society. What are your reasons for this seemingly
thoughtless act? Agriculture contributes about the same to GDP as
mining, so there is not much economic freedom to be gained here
either.

Also consider that history has shown land redistribution to result in
productive farms going to ruin and the black recipients selling the
land back to the original white owners. This affects every citizen of
South Africa in terms of food prices and food security. How do you
plan to address this problem?


Education

Ninety-nine per cent of whites do not own any farms or mines. Yet, on
average, white people earn 8 times more than black people. Why? White
people have an eight times higher ability to earn, to add value. This
ability to earn comes from education, an excellent work ethic and a
willingness to serve. I am convinced that this is the only route to
economic freedom. Why are you not influencing the youth of the nation
in this direction?

Your mother body, the ANC, has produced an education system that has
been proven to only educate one out of every 29 black learners to a
level of functional literacy. Seeing the crucial importance of
education, why do you not demand better government performance instead
of nationalization and expropriation?


Compensation

I can understand that you feel aggrieved with the situation that
apartheid has left you with and therefore demand compensation from
white people. However, on average, each white person already supports
around five blacks by means of social grants, RDP housing and free
services. By doing this, white people give you a fair chance to make
something of your life by taking care of your basic livelihood. What
more can we do?

Would you be satisfied if all white people were just as poor as
blacks? Do you want every white person to leave South Africa? Please
consider that both these options will remove significantly more than
half of the nation's wealth, while keeping the population roughly the
same. The poor will remain unemployable, but there will be no funds
for any kind of state support – no housing and basic services,
dangerous shortages in food and water, no public healthcare and no
affordable schooling. Is this what you want?


In closing

If you can intelligently answer these questions, I will be more than
willing to listen. If, however, you cannot, one has to conclude that
you are doing the country and its youth a terrible disservice and the
loss of an entire generation of South Africans has to rest squarely on
your shoulders.

Regards,
Schalk

2011-09-23

[Fwd: Rugby vir beginners...]

2011-09-09

Fwd: Don't forget next Sunday

WALK NAKED IN SOUTH AFRICA DAY TO MARK THE 9/11 ANNIVERSARY

Don't forget to mark your calendars!!

As you may already know, it is a sin for a Muslim male to see any
woman other than his wife naked -- and if he does, he must commit
suicide.

So, next Sunday at 1 PM, all South African women are asked to walk out
of their house **completely naked**  to help weed out any
neighbourhood terrorists.

Circling your block for one hour is recommended for this anti-terrorist effort.

All patriotic South African men are to position themselves in lawn
chairs in front of their houses to demonstrate their support for the
women and to prove that they are not Muslim terrorist sympathizers.

Since Islam also does not approve of alcohol, a cold 6-pack at your
side is further proof of your patriotism.

The South African government appreciates your efforts to root out
terrorists and applauds your participation in this anti-terrorist
activity.

P.S. If you don't send this to at least 1 person, you're a
terrorist-sympathizing, lily-livered coward and are possibly aiding
and abetting terrorists!!!

2011-08-16

[Fwd: Poor strikers]

2011-08-13

Fwd: Laugh a little...

Julius Malema lost his cheque book. So he goes to the bank.

Bank Manager: Be careful, anyone can forge your signature.

Malema: I'm not a fool, I have already signed all the cheques!

2011-08-04

Fwd: Jag-geleentheid

'n Vriend van my het onlangs 'n wildsplaas gekoop, en dit in 'n
jagplaas omskep.

Hy sukkel nog om 'n kliëntebasis op te bou en het gevra dat ek hom
help adverteer:

Koedoes ± R2000, rooibok ± R400, blesbok ± R500

Akkommodasie R280 per nag, drie etes per dag ingesluit.

Kontak hom by: jan.jagplaas@yahoo.co.za

P.S. Ek sluit besonderhede van sy twee spoorsnyers / veldgidse in.
(R70/dag ekstra)

2011-07-26

[Fwd: Baboons]

A racist comment made on Facebook landed a young HPCSA employee in hot
water when she was arrested and charged with crimen injuria on Monday
morning.

The woman, who cannot be named as she has not appeared in court, was
arrested after she compared strikers to *baboons* and said they
intimidated people with their *grunting noises*. She did not participate
in the strike.

Warrant Officer Duane Lightfoot, of the Sunnyside police station,
confirmed that she had been arrested and said she was still in custody.
She will appear in the Pretoria Magistrate's court on Tuesday.

http://www.iol.co.za/news/crime-courts/woman-in-hot-water-over-baboon-ji
be-1.1105774

-------------

Since this is regarded a "racist" incident, it's safe to assume the
unnamed woman is white. Were she black or Indian, there'd likely be no
brouhaha.

Now, let's venture the far flung assumption of a bunch of white folks
going on strike and then leaving a mess behind. Should anyone calling
them "pigs" be considered a racist as well (irrespective whether that
person is black or white)?

2011-07-23

[Fwd: BUITE WERKING]

Lost in translation...

2011-07-03

[Fwd: Affirmative Action]

Consider this:

South Africa is the only country in the world where affirmative action
is in the favour of the majority who has complete political control.

The fact that the political majority requires affirmative action to
protect them against a 9% minority group is testament to a complete
failure on their part to build their own wealth-producing structures --
so that their only solution is to take it from others.

2011-06-29

[Fwd: Widow, 80, relives rape by intruder]

She begged their attackers not to kill her husband while they were
trying to strangle him with her jersey and she was throttled and
repeatedly punched in the face while one of the intruders raped her.

This was the testimony of an 80-year-old woman on Monday in the Pretoria
High Court.

The dignified and composed woman pointed out her rapist in court, as
being accused number one, Vincent Ramatsoma, 34, of Mamelodi East.

He has admitted to the rape. He said in his explanation of plea that he
did have sex with the elderly woman on April 26, 2008, and that it was
his intention to rape her.

He is facing six charges, including murder, rape, robbery and various
charges of contravening the arms and ammunition act, together with his
two co-accused, Tshepo Bigboy Sekele, 28 and Ben Mmapeya, 26, also of
Mamelodi East.

Apart from Ramatsoma admitting to the rape, all three pleaded not guilty
to the charges.

Reliving the events of that night, the woman (who cannot be identified
as she is a rape victim) told Judge Bert Bam that she was in the kitchen
at about nine, washing dishes.

She thought she had locked the kitchen door, but it later appeared it
was not properly secured. She meanwhile went to join her husband in the
lounge, where he was watching television.

"The next moment I saw three men. One pushed me down on my chair and the
other two went to my husband.

"I was forced to take off my blouse and jersey while one of the
intruders tried to throttle me.

"I was pushed down on the floor and the other two tried to throttle my
husband with my jersey.

"I kept on asking them in Zulu not to hurt my husband."

The victim said one of the men tried to drag her towards the bedroom,
but she said she would walk. He then led her towards the bedroom. One of
the other intruders then came to the bedroom with an iron and some rope.

** He shouted at me that I am a boer and that he was going to burn me
and kill me. **

"He swore at me and swore at my dead mother, using the most terrible
language. I asked him whether he had a mother and a grandmother, but he
just laughed at me.

"He then told me to lie on the ground, but I refused. He pushed me on
the bed and pulled off my clothes, before he raped me.

"While raping me, he throttled me and repeatedly bashed me in the face
with his fist until I could no longer see through my eyes.

"He threw my clothes at me afterwards and told me to get dressed."

The victim said she was taken to the main bedroom, where she saw her
husband was tied to a chair.

The room was in disarray and the intruders climbed on top of her husband
on the chair, to get to the top of the cupboard.

They also emptied the safe of its firearms and took out her husband's
hunting knife.

"One of them tried to intimidate me by showing me the sharp blade."

They took her husband outside and tried to force him to get his car
started, but it had a battery problem.

When it did not start, they came to the woman to help them. She said she
advised them to push the car until it started.

"I again asked them not to kill my husband. They said they would not and
that they would tie him on the bed with me, which they did before they
left."

The woman said her husband had blood coming out of his ear and his
mouth. Apart from his broken dentures, it seemed he had not suffered any
other injuries.

But as the weeks went by, he became more and more disorientated and it
was eventually established that he had blood on the brain. He died three
months later.

The woman said her husband never recovered from the bad feeling arising
from the fact that he had taught women self defence during his life, but
that he could do nothing to protect her that day.

The case is proceeding. - Pretoria News

2011-06-28

[Fwd: Boere Computer Dictionary]

Monitor - Keeping an eye on the braai
Download - Get the firewood off the bakkie
Hard drive - Trip back home without any cold beer
Keyboard - Where you hang the bakkie and bike keys
Window - What you shut when it's cold
Screen - What you shut in the mosquito season
Byte - What mosquitoes do
Bit - What mosquitoes did
Mega Byte - What moerse big mosquitoes at the dam do
Chip - A bar snack
Micro Chip - What's left in the bag after you have eaten the chips
Modem - What you did to the lawns
Dot Matrix - Oom Jan Matrix's wife
Laptop - Where the cat sleeps
Software - Plastic knives and forks you get at KFC
Hardware - Real stainless steel knives and forks from Checkers
Mouse - What eats the grain in the shed
Mouse Pad - Where the mouse takes the grain it does not eat
Mainframe - What holds the garden shed up
Web - What spiders make
Web Site - The shed (or under the veranda)
Cursor - The old toppie what swears a lot
Search Engine - What you do when the bakkie won't go
Yahoo - What you say when the bakkie does go
Upgrade - A steep koppie
Server - The gentleman at the pub that brings out the lunch
Mail Server - The oke at the pub that brings out the lunch
User - The neighbour that keeps borrowing things
Network - When you have to repair your fishing net
Internet - Complicated fish net repair method
Netscape - When fish maneuvers out of reach of net
Online - When you get the laundry hung out
Offline - When the pegs don't hold the washing up

2011-06-21

[Fwd: Seks is soos 'n payslip]

Seks is soos 'n payslip. Mens praat nie rerig daaroor nie, want dalk kry
die ander ou meer as jy!!

---------

Juffrou gee wiskunde. "Gertjie verstaan jy alles?"
"Sjoe juffrou, net so kol kol!"
"Watter kol verstaan jy nie, Gertjie?"
"Fokol juffrou, fokol!"

---------

'n Les uit geskiedenis: Rasse intergrasie is soos om kak en roomys te
meng. Dit doen niks regtig aan die kak nie, maar dit fok die roomys
heeltemal op!

---------

Wetenskap het bewys dat vrouens se wangspiere SO sterk is dat, as sy
dikbek is, hou dit selfs haar bene toe!!

---------

'n REGTE rassis is iemand wat 'n sebra skiet, en dan net biltong maak
van die wit stukke....

---------

Wat is die top punt van gesuip?
As jy oor die dansvloer loop vir nog n dop, en jy wen die singles dans
kompetisie!

---------

Dronk katoliek sit in biegkas (confession).
Na 'n baie lang stilte klop die priester om man se aandag te trek.
"Jy klop verniet!," skree dronkie terug, "hier is ook nie kakpapier nie!"

---------

Seuntjie van drie vrae aan sy ouma: "Ouma, is jy van karton gemaak?"
Ouma lag lekker en sê: "Haai nee my skat, hoekom vra jy dan nou vir Ouma
so?"
Seuntjie antwoord: "Want Pappa sê altyd Ouma is 'n regte ou doos."

---------

Geduld is 'n stadige manier om jou moer heeltemal te strip

2011-05-27

[Fwd: Cops fail hijack victims]

Cops fail hijack victims
May 27 2011 at 07:45am
By Graeme Hosken

Allegedly hijacked by police and driven around for hours before being
faced with execution, a Pretoria father of three is battling a year
later to get the SAPS to investigate the attack.

After spending thousands of rands, Piet Erasmus, 52, says he has done
more in the past few months in investigating his brush with death than
the police have done in the past year.

Erasmus was travelling to Polokwane in his Mercedes-Benz when he was
hijacked on the N1 near the Murrayhill Toll Plaza in January last year
by four men driving a marked police Golf GTI fitted with emergency
lights and a siren.

The men, who have not been caught, have, according to police, allegedly
been responsible for 100 such attacks on that stretch of highway.

Police have slammed Erasmus and his attorney, Delia de Vries, saying
they have not forgotten his case.

Hammanskraal police station spokeswoman Constable Mkvotso Mphenyeke said
although no arrests had been made, the case was being investigated.

"The car was recently found abandoned in Joburg and the complainant went
to identify it," she said.

Investigating officer Warrant Officer Hendrik Sebola said he was doing
everything in his power to catch the culprits. "Erasmus is one of 100
such victims of hijackings by these suspects. We are investigating all
these cases so we can catch these suspects, who we are not even sure are
real policemen.

"What we do know is that every time there is such an attack those who
carry out the hijackings are dressed like police."

De Vries and Erasmus believe that if the police were interested in the
attacks they could solve his case.

Erasmus said he was forced to stop after the police car raced up behind
him with its lights flashing and its siren on.

Getting out of the car, Erasmus was confronted by two men in police
uniform.

"They were armed with sidearms, wearing the SAPS uniform and reflector
vests with 'Police' written on them.

"Their vehicle had a siren and was fitted with blue lights on the roof,
dashboard and in the grille and it was marked with police insignia.

"The policemen told me that they were looking for a car that fitted my
vehicle's description.

"As I opened the boot two men in civilian clothes got out of the police
car. As they ran at me one of the policemen pulled out his gun and
shoved it into my ribs.

"One of the civilians grabbed my keys and drove off with my car.

"The policemen pushed me into their car and sped off with me."

After driving around for three hours the men eventually made Erasmus get
out of the car. With his hands tied behind his back, he was made to
kneel on the ground.

"When they took out their gun I thought that this was it."

Praying, Erasmus was saved when two teachers on their way to school
drove towards them, prompting the gunmen to flee.

Erasmus said he had waited for feedback from the police for months.

"No one came to me. I got so frustrated with their pathetic attitude
that I began my own investigation with the help of a police friend."

Gathering cellphone records for his SIM card, Erasmus began to trace his
attackers.

"I got documents, telephone numbers and other information. I phoned the
investigator, but he was not interested."

The final straw for Erasmus was when Gauteng Flying Squad members
recovered his car in Joburg in February.

"I got a call and went with the investigator to identify my car. I
immediately recognised it and when I opened it I found utility bills and
receipts inside.

"The investigator was not interested and when I confronted him he just
told me to take my car."

Determined to get justice, Erasmus continued with his own investigation.

"I found out where the utility bills were from, I discovered that the
businesses from where the receipts were from had CCTV footage of those
driving my car, but still the police were not interested.

"I don't understand it. How can they not be interested in evidence which
could help catch these thugs?

"It is clear that they are not interested in catching their own and
putting them behind bars, but I am and I will get justice."

De Vries, who has served a letter of demand on the Police Ministry,
said: "Police are paid to catch criminals, but they are not interested
in doing their jobs.

"One would think police would want to solve crimes, even if it means
turning on their own." - Pretoria News

http://www.iol.co.za/news/crime-courts/cops-fail-hijack-victims-1.1074695

2011-05-05

Fwd: Why South Africans need a GPS


2011-05-01

Fwd: Only in Africa!

2011-04-08

[Fwd: No explanation required!]

I could *so* use a couple of dozen of these!!!!

The New Great Trek

The New Great Trek
by Johann van Rooyen

(dated at least March 2001)

The scope of South Africa's exodus

Thousands of predominantly-white, young, skilled South Africans of all
persuasions, regions and professions are leaving the country each year
to settle in mainly Australia, New Zealand, Britain, the USA and Canada.
Official statistics suggest that just more than 8 200 people had
emigrated from South Africa during 1998, but due to an under-reporting
of between one-half and two-thirds, the unofficial total will have been
between 16 000 and 25 000. These latest emigrants joined the 550 000
emigrants who have officially left since 1945, in addition to the 500
000 to one million emigrants who may have left the country unofficially
during this period.

The real significance of this exodus can be found primarily not so much
in the sheer size of the exodus, even though it is large by any
standard, but in the fact that these emigrants represent a huge loss of
human capital - they are mostly professionals and their skills and
ability to create wealth and jobs cannot be replaced overnight, if at
all. In addition, emigration on this scale raises the questions of how
many more people may join this new Trek, and whether it emigration will
continue at current levels or whether a sudden mass exodus is a
possibility?

Official statistics vs. the actual numbers: the 2:1 and 3:1 ratios

As mentioned earlier, the number of people leaving South Africa each
year is at least double and could be triple the official numbers
provided by Statistics South Africa. The reason for this is because many
people who leave the country do so under the pretext of temporary visits
and do not state on their departure forms that they are emigrating, but
merely going on holiday - they will therefore not appear in the official
emigration statistics. The result is the huge discrepancy between
official or self-declared emigrants and unofficial emigrant numbers (the
undocumented migrants). Even the South African authorities are aware of
this phenomenon, but are powerless to do anything about it, according to
Mark Orkin, chief of Statistics South Africa.

The discrepancies between official and unofficial statistics (the latter
obtained from the embassies and immigration departments of several
countries) are glaringly obvious: -Official South African figures claim
that 29 000 South Africans had settled in the UK between 1984 and 1993,
compared to figure of 100 000 claimed by British sources. … Assuming
that the British numbers are the correct version, three times more
emigrants arrived in the UK than was counted by South African sources.
For the period of 1994-1997, 8 874 South Africans entered the UK as
immigrants although the South African official sources counted only 4
654 - almost double.

The logistics of emigration

...the presence of hundreds of thousands of South African emigrants all
over the world is evidence of the fact that, irrespective of obstacles
and sacrifices, emigration has become a realistic and logical choice for
many predominantly white South Africans and is viewed as a readily
available alternative to life in South Africa. However, there are at
least four distinct obstacles facing a typical emigrant: the first being
emotional and psychological barriers; the steep costs of emigration; the
financial and administrative barriers erected by the South African
authorities; the entry restrictions placed on emigration by various
countries through a multitude of entry requirements.

The key to successful emigration lies in overcoming these barriers one
by one, but even the most meticulous planning and the highest number of
emigration points cannot always overcome what could be the biggest
hurdle, namely the emotional costs of emigration - saying goodbye to
family, friends, often the family pet, to a particular lifestyle,
traditions and familiar things, and to one's country of birth and all it
represents - these all are the things that often prove to be the biggest
obstacle.

Psychological and emotional aspects

Among the typical comments from emigrants describing the pain and
emotional turmoil are the following: when she finally got on the plane,
(she) cried so much that the air hostess asked her if there had been a
death in the family - emigrant, Sydney.

...this may also explain why so many people do not to use the term
emigration, i.e. because of its finality - they refer instead
euphemistically to `relocation` and to `going overseas for a while` - in
fact, as mentioned elsewhere, up to two-thirds of people leaving South
Africa each year do not formally `emigrate`, although this is probably
largely because of practical rather than emotional reasons.

Many emigrants have to cope with feelings of guilt for leaving the
country in which they grew up and which educated them - they are often
accused of having lived off the fat of the land and wanting to jump ship
when the going gets tough. However, up to two thirds of emigrants,
according to an Idasa survey, have a desire to stay and help build South
Africa, but feel compelled to leave because of crime.

Why do people leave South Africa?

...South African emigrants are motivated by a number of typical `push`
factors and these are countered by many `pull` factors. The typical
emigrant will list various `push` factors in order of importance, among
which will be uncertainty about the future, falling standards, the
economy, affirmative action and bleak job prospects, and loss of faith
in the ANC-led government, but most importantly, he or she will list
violent crime as the real reason for wanting to emigrate. Surveys
indicate that 60% of emigrants regard crime as the major reason for
leaving South Africa, while 19% cite concern for their children's
education. A total of 15% of emigrants said that they were looking for a
better quality of life, 14% wanted better prospects in general, 20% were
concerned about healthcare, and 10% cited the government, the economy
and affirmative action as reasons for emigrating.

In this chapter each of these issues will be examined in the context in
which they contribute to emigration from South Africa.

The emigration debate

Emigration has always been an emotional issue in South Africa largely
because it has always been viewed from a political perspective, rather
than as a social or economic phenomenon. As the numbers of emigrants
increased and surpassed the numbers of immigrants during the second half
of the 1990s, emotions rose to new levels and the opposition to
emigration fiercer - arguments for and against emigration became more
politicised, personal and took on a racial flavour. This is not
surprising as the vast majority of emigrants are white and the vast
majority of whites voted against the ANC in both post-apartheid
elections. In South Africa's current political climate, the
anti-government sentiment of many whites is easily construed as
disloyalty against the ANC and against the country - the perception is
that emigrants are disloyal South Africans.

The debate is structured as follows: while the one side is questioning
the loyalty and patriotism of those who were leaving, the other side
points to the socio-political conditions that cause people to leave the
country and insists that emigration is a constitutional and human right.
The emigration debate was fuelled by former president Nelson Mandela's
comments in 1998, that `real South Africans are ...not going to run
away`. While Mandela received much support for calling a `spade a
spade`, his comments also drew sharp criticism from some South Africans
for what they perceived as interference in their democratic right to
emigrate, while others demanded that the President address the
underlying causes for emigration rather than attacking emigrants.
Despite the arguments between those who criticise emigration and those
who defend the freedom to emigrate, which are based mostly on abstract
emotional terms such as patriotism, racism and anger towards the
government, the real issue revolves around the impact that emigration
has on the South African economy. In other words, what is the cost of
emigration to the country in terms of the outflow of skills and capital,
especially in the absence of a compensating inflow of skilled immigrants?

...the magnitude of the current brain drain and the potential flight of
skills from South Africa are truly shocking. Surveys commissioned by the
Sunday Times in 1998 concluded that between 71% and 74% of professional
people in South Africa was considering emigrating. The survey found that
almost a similar percentage of skilled blacks also considered leaving
the country, although three quarters of these would do so for study
purposes, that is, not permanently. The survey was extensive and
received 11 000 individual responses from those with professional
qualifications, and despite some criticism against its methodology, the
survey provided a fairly representative sampling of the opinion of
professionals...

However, the converse is also true. South Africa gains skills from
immigrants and it is an irrefutable fact that for a long time officially
South Africa had a net gain of skilled people because of migrants. These
people came to South Africa with their degrees, skills and capital to
the great benefit of the country - referred to as the `brain-gain`. For
this very reason it is so difficult to understand or justify the
bureaucratic bungling of the Department of Home Affairs when issuing
work and residency permits to foreign skilled workers.

While the decline in immigration during the 1990s was partially a result
of the unstable political situation and because of violence and crime,
it was also a result of the Department of Home Affairs` absurdly
stringent immigration policies and restrictions on work and residency
visas. While South Africa has an urgent need for professionals in most
categories, official policies have led to a decline in the numbers of
professionals such as doctors, managers and engineers entering the
country over the past five years: between 1993 and 1998 the number of
professional immigrants has declined by 74%, from 1,171 in 1993 to 307
in 1998.

2011-03-06

Fwd: Riding the ANACONDA

I am a father. So,sometimes i need to do stuff that fathers do. In the
old days, it was marbles and tolle and ketties. Things have changed.

So,two weeks ago,the fucking bright sparks over the road here,whispered
the words "GOLD REEF CITY" into my laaities ears,and what can you do?You
go to GRC.

Ok,so i checked the website...nananana,looks like piss,hier en daar n
fokken ride or two,and i wanted to go down the mine. So ek trek my
plakkies aan, kam my hare, and off we go.

We got there early. Ek kap manhaftig twee worsbroodjies weg, en n
halfliter melk, and followed my son to the first ride...called Runaway
Train.

We get on, and i thought these things were for kids and stuff,and off it
went. I did not like it. It was going sideways and shit,and i was queasy
when i got off.

What bothered me though was the sound coming from behind me somewhere.
Dit klink soos n fokken boeing wat land. And then i saw it. Big
signwriting...ANAFOKKENCONDA.

I had to keep face, i wear the pants in this family. Ek maak my arms
bak, en ek loop fier en regop teen die dekplank op. Ek gaan die donner
ry, what can go wrong?

There was a queue and the fuck up with that is, you can see what the
thing does to people.

When it came in the second time,and a young student dude, met spiere
waar ek voue het, got out, and kots oor die reling, toe weet ek, my kak
is uitgeknip vir my.

Then it was our turn.Jono chickened out, BUT my wife was checking me
out. This is where you have to be nonchalant,and manly. I kept my chin
up, en my hol toegeknyp.

You get into this thing, and you hang. The safety bar didnt want to go
over my hoenderborsie, so i pulled a Ville Valo, and made myself thin,
and hooked a clip too close....i think.

KLANG KLANG KLANG KLANG....en kom ons fok nie rond nie....skielik is ek
so bang dat ek n bliksemse nieraanval kry.....

dan draai die etterse ding en dan......P@$S HY NA BENEDE....MET DIE
SPOED VAN DIE HEILIGE FOKKEN WIT ELAND.

I shit you not, forget any car,bike,plane or whatever the fuck you
measure your manliness by....it accelerated like nothing i have ever felt.
But if this wasnt enough, gaan donner die ding onderstebo met jou. I
feel the worsrolletjie. No wait, i feel the texture of the
worsrolletjie, every fucking fibre of the worsrolletjie.

Kerels, we came out that first loop met die spoed van fokken wit lig. I
wanted it to stop.I havent prayed in 22 years....i did then. We levelled
out,and then it hit the second loop.
Shorter radius than the first. Ons fok daardeur,en ek verloor my
plakkie. Onderstebo, and then around 2 flat corners wa ek 10 jaar ouer
word, and then....the fucking thing corkscrewed.
Klits daai fokken broodjie en die melk laat dit lyk soos daai kak wat jy
oor bobotie gooi, and another,en fok dit, toe skree ek soos n Namibiese
vlakte vlermuis wat se sonar gekak het.

And into the station at 200kmh, and just for shits and giggles, they
stop it in 10m flat.

I just sat there. Stunned,and my wife is oooh and aaaahing, en
lets-go-againing....sy moet haar jags hou.

It fucked my whole day up.

2011-03-02

[Fwd: 'Tokoloshe stole court dockets']

A public petition handed to the Pietermaritzburg Magistrate's Court on
Monday alleges that tokoloshes (evil spirits) are being used to steal
court dockets.

The petition alleged that murder accused Mduduzi Manqele, a wealthy
traditional healer, was "well-known for keeping evil creatures which
collect dockets from court".

"We fear, once released, his evil creatures will tamper with the
investigations," the petition continued.

A crowd of of people, who had travelled about 45km to the court,
protested loudly outside.

Manqele, 48, and co-accused Roger Thusi, 30, face charges of murdering
Loyisa Jokweni, 18, whose head was found in a freezer in the home of
Thusi's girlfriend in Pietermaritzburg.

A source in the community said Thusi led the police to Manqele after
allegedly being told by him to behead Jokweni and put the head in a
freezer "to get rich".

After the discovery of the head in the freezer, angry people from the
area where Manqele practised set fire to his house and tuckshop. They
also burned the house where Thusi allegedly kept the head, with a frozen
snake coiled around it.

...and there goes the evidence a first- or third-world police could've
used for the case.

------------------

PS: The pamphlet is, in fact, part of a guerilla marketing campaign for
a movie. See http://www.nightdrivemovie.com/

2011-02-22

[Fwd: Cop accused of raping man]

By Karabo Seanego

A Tshwane Metro Police officer is expected to appear in the Pretoria
Magistrate's Court soon after he allegedly raped a man and stole his
cellphone.

He is the second Tshwane Metro Police officer to be arrested in less
than a fortnight.

In the latest incident a 29-year-old off-duty officer was arrested on
Friday night for rape and theft.

Police said the officer and his alleged victim were having drinks in
Pretoria North.

The officer later offered to take the man home but in 15th Avenue,
Rietfontein, he allegedly raped him.

The 26 year-old alleged victim managed to walk to the Moot police
station in 18 th Avenue to report the matter.

Police spokesman Tshisikhawe Ndou said: "Immediately after the incident
he left the victim there and fled the scene.

"The suspect will be facing a charge of rape as well as theft of a
cellphone. He will be appearing in the Pretoria Magistrate's Court
soon."

This brings the number of metro police officers who have been arrested
for criminal behaviour to two this month.

The Tshwane Metro Police Department (TMPD) said more than 30 cases
involving its members are being investigated.

Fwd: Big Boy!

2011-02-09

[Fwd: South Africa: On the road to ruin]

South Africans seem to be in a bit of a foul and restless mood, with
the gyrations of our philandering president and the rather large
potholes on our roads being the subjects enjoying the attention of
raspier tongues, especially among the chattering classes.

Jacob Zuma is, frankly, not worth our breath. He's best left alone. He's
digging his own grave. Potholes - and the general decline of our
infrastructure - are another matter, however. They are a serious matter,
but only the tip of the iceberg.

Travelling around the country, one cannot but be shocked at the state of
our towns and cities. The streets are a sorry mess, squalid, with
overgrown verges, paint peeling off buildings - a general state of
neglect and decay. It's as if nobody is in charge. It is as though since
the last apartheid apparatchik was chased out of town nobody has cared
to lift a finger even to sweep the place. And with the current obsession
with renaming things, one is often even confused as to which town or
street one is in.

In days yonder, a perfect date for a township dude, dressed to the nines
of course, was taking her to the movies, and thereafter some
"window-shopping" in town. Not anymore. It's all boarded up now. Whether
it's Johannesburg, Pretoria, Durban, or any of the many small towns
across the land, some parts of the CBD have become a jungle, and even a
health hazard. No longer a place to dare to venture, let alone take a
leisurely stroll. Capital has also taken flight.

The ANC woke up quite late in the day to the crucial role played by
local government in the life of a nation. After the election in 1994,
most of the organisation's bright sparks scrambled for seats in the
national parliament. Positions in city and town councils were seen as
nothing but crumbs from the table. It was left to its third string to
run our towns and cities. And they've run them down.

Also, in trying to merge towns and townships and do away with the old
apartheid boundaries, the ANC has lumped everything together to create
huge metropolises which its hand-picked, often incompetent, mandarins
have found almost impossible to govern. It created a gulf between
rate-payers and city halls, hence the alienation.

But the biggest problem, which probably explains the nationwide protests
over service delivery, is our system of local government, which ensures
that town mayors and managers whose actions and decisions have a huge
impact on people's lives are imposed by party bosses without any say by
the governed. Such a system is obviously undemocratic, and is no credit
to our much-vaunted constitution.

People in such positions are often not sensitive to ordinary citizens'
concerns because they are not appointed or elected by them. They are
accountable to those who appointed them, the party bosses. Which is why
Amos Masondo, the dozy mayor of Johannesburg, can easily pooh-pooh the
outrage caused by the potholes which have disfigured the streets of this
metropolis. He's not bothered by the outrage. He was imposed by the ANC.
And as long as the ANC is happy with this sort of incompetence, so is he.

The country holds yet another local government election next year. It
will improve or solve nothing. We will exchange one group of
incompetents for yet another bunch of ineffectual individuals. They're
not to blame either. It's simply the outcome of an inappropriate system
of government.

It's not surprising that as we approach next year's election, none of
the political parties has suggested making the system more accountable.
They won't. The current system suits them just fine.

If you want clean streets and refuse that's removed on time, agitate for
elected representatives at local government. It's called democracy.

2011-02-02

Fwd: Seen at a Cape Town Checkers staff entrance

Is die Kaap nie 'n wonderlike plek nie? Ek dink nie jy sal 'n
soortgelyke kennisgewing enige ander plek in die wereld kry nie!

2011-01-07

Fwd: Welkom in ons vuilgat dorpie

2011-01-05

[Fwd: HAPPY NEW YEAR]

In case you were thinking that Berea and Hillbrow entered the New Year
(2010) in a civilized fashion, the MOB showed their mentality.

This series of photographs was taken between 7am and 8am on 1 January,
2010. Is this a war zone or a NORMAL residential area, one might ask.

These people have the STRANGEST way of celebrating -- by TRASHING their
streets.

The people of Hillbrow and Berea have a somewhat unique way of heralding
in the New Year.

Each New Year's night, at the stroke of midnight, they show their
enthusiasm and exuberance by throwing their belongings over their flats'
balconies.

However, as had been the case in previous years, I did not see any
fridges or stoves that had been thrown off any balconies this year.

I MUST pay a CID levy to clean up others' MESS!!!!

Now I understand why the SAP were issued with military "moss-doppe"
(steel helmet, plastic liner) for doing their patrolling last night. Not
that a moss-dop would offer much protection, without its steel "outer".

A year or two ago we were told that the police went into these buildings
and MADE the tenants come out and clean their MESS. Certainly not the
case here. This building also falls within the CID area, I have to PAY
extra, besides my rates and taxes, to keep the place "cleaner."

I wonder if someone went without a bed after the celebrations?/

The ABOVE pictures show clearly why South Africa under the MOB RULE
system of so called DEMOCRACY can NEVER work.

The mob's MENTALITY is quite obvious.

And with authorities who are TOTALLY incompetent and incapable of
running the bathwater, let alone a city.

The final, long-term outcome, is quite clear.

One consolation, I suppose, I never saw any fridges or stoves that had
been thrown off balconies this year.

For those of you that might have friends and relatives (especially
overseas) that knew what Hillbrow used to be like in the NAUGHTY
apartheid days, please pass this mail on to them so they can see how
much things have *IMPROVED* under the new dispensation. *Viva !!!*

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